for once i dont know how i should begin my post for the day.

there's like so many things in my mind i just dont know what they are.

i dont know how to start, where to start.
whats wrong with me? whats wrong with me? whats wrong with me?
i effingly dont know!

i havent been feeling well lately ( i think ) been rather feverish, but i dont think there is fever. idk la. one thing i know, i feel ubber weak. i shall take things slow, very slow now.

things at home's rather low right now. been sleeping over sis place for th past few days.
well. Mom and I will try to help you in anyway we can. you have been through hell lot. whatever it is be strong yea sis! We're with you, He's with you. (:

there's so many things i want to do right now.
scream. shout. cry. hide where noone can see me. sleep. run away. hibernate, wishing that everything is brighter when i wake up. indulge myself with goood foood. chocolates. chips. ice creams. loud music. sit in one corner with a book. shop till im satisfied. laugh till my stomach hurts and starts crying. go to the beach. play. catch sunrise. sunsets. baking. cooking. cleaning.

i never like growing up and stepping into adulthood, it gives me headache.
well, there's still a loooooooong waaaaay to go. sigh.

&&loverboy,

there's so many things about US im thinking about. it is very tiring. mentally and emotionally tiring. no im not tired of you, dont think that way. just so you know, i am afraid. afraid with the thought that you'll leave. thinking about it just got me so weak at times.

blablabla.. im tired. goodnight.

xoxoxo
misses&loves,
IN.